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Notes on 'Mr. Toad Goes to Therapy'

2024-09-09 10:04:21   1  Report

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Outline/Content

The state of a person

The Child Ego State

What: is built from the remnants of our childhood, containing all the emotions we experienced as children.

The basic emotions of childhood gradually evolve and develop into more subtle and complex behavioral models, which become the core of the self, blend into our bodies, defining our behavior throughout our lives.

divide

Natural child

Joy and affection, anger, sadness, fear

Adaptive children

Compliant behavior in response to strict parents

agree, please, apologize, depend

Defense mechanisms
How to release anger

Parent Ego State

What: It includes all the values and moral views we have learned from our parents since birth,
It also includes the criteria for judging life, allowing us to judge right and wrong.

divide

Strict parents

Critical, angry, strict

Operation mode
1. Criticize others
2. Criticize yourself

Adult status

What: Act in a rational rather than emotional way. All our knowledge and skills belong to ourselves, not driven by the voices of our parents in our minds from the past, nor trapped by the emotions of our childhood.

Life Coordinates and Psychological Games

Life Coordinates

I'm fine, and you're fine too.

Non-stationary state, but a dynamic process

I think I am good, and I believe others are good.

Show consistency to yourself and others through actions and attitudes

A belief from the heart

I'm fine, you're not.

murder

Critical Parent State

Parenting state (hypocrisy)
I am more heartbroken than you
I am doing this for your own good

I'm not good, you're good.

suicide

I'm not good, neither are you.

Game

alcoholism

generate bad and unpleasant emotions

Guess what I'm thinking

The teacher has always played this game with the students, the teacher is the winner, and the students feel stupid.

I am really unfortunate.

I am convinced that I am unfortunate.

Believing that there are negative forces affecting oneself, feeling unable to control one's life, experiencing anxiety, and feeling that one is not good enough.

Do your best to remember sad and unhappy things, forget or ignore good times.

Prone to depression

PLOM
Poor Little Old Me

Collude with the other party, secretly or unconsciously cooperate with the other party, causing oneself discomfort. The loser in the game is considered the winner.

attack oneself

Love me no matter what I do

Life is a mess, or intentionally or unintentionally getting into trouble, just to see how tolerant others can be and when they will repel them

I will make the people I respect and love give up on me.

NIGYYSOB
I got you, you bad guy

Often appear in the workplace, scolding the subordinates who made mistakes, making a big deal out of small things, thus proving "I am good, you are not good"

Why do you always disappoint me?

Strengthen your sense of superiority.

How dare you

Emotional Intelligence

Understand the emotional world in your heart and be able to control it.

People with high EQ

A strong sense of self

Understand your emotions

Be able to manage emotions

Be able to recover from sadness and misfortune

be able to control impulses

Know how to delay gratification